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Ask, Feel, Trust.

A woman leaning on God for help
I was conversing with one of my friends the other day, and I mentioned how I’ve chested every single thing that has come my way recently. Then, I linked it to the fact that sometimes I don’t fully process my emotions, especially when I’m in a conversation with God. I feel guilty for even having those emotions in the first place. You know that thing where you ask someone a question and then answer it for them? Or there is a situation that needs to be resolved by someone and you look for reasons why the situation shouldn't be there instead of resolving it.

I’ve realized I do that for one reason: so God won’t think I harbor unbelief or fear in my heart. Basically, I try to impress God. Lol, the same God that knows my deepest thoughts.

Then I thought of David, a man after God’s heart, yet he allowed himself to feel all the emotions he needed to feel, asked all the questions he wanted to ask, and then rounded it off with his belief and trust in God.

He never tried to act like everything was fine when it clearly wasn’t. He stated everything as it was and how he saw it, before he finally got clarity on it.
Case in point: Psalm 73, where he lamented about seeing the wicked prospering for 16 verses before a resolution came.

I don’t know if everything I’ve written makes sense. I’m not even going to try to make it pretty or standard, but all I’m driving at is this: You don’t have to chest it all. Sometimes, let out the frustration. You don’t have to be strong for God or pretend like you’re okay with everything.

Ask the hard questions, drop the faux strength, and draw your strength from Him.
Selah.
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