The Twentieth Floor

 I decided I was going to write a blog post to mark the end of an era and the beginning of another, but as I type this I have no words. Nothing comes to mind, but here I go anyway…

It feels like just yesterday I was excited about turning thirteen. I think that was the very first birthday I was excited about. It felt so nice to finally be a teenager. I left the children’s church to the teen church, and I left Junior Secondary School for Senior Secondary School. The most interesting part was, I was towing a new path the ones before me didn’t tow. Judith decided to go to Art class to the “dismay” of the African parents’ stereotype. I think that was the first real decision that came with a battle that I ever took (big ups to my brother for fighting that battle with me🫂). 

 I was not always the brightest of mind, but it felt like a new journey for me and I had the nudge to be among the best, if not the best. 

I had always been a church girl but, my 13th year marked the beginning of my redemption story, the year 2017.

The next year, 2018, there was a paradigm shift, and academically, I decided to not be mediocre. So I took that journey with God, and it did pay off. I learnt that determination, with the help of God, is key, and I ran along with that till the year 2020; the year I turned sixteen.

Sweet sixteen purr💅

The cake was too heavy🥲

 Interestingly, the Jamb literature for that year was titled "Sweet Sixteen", and I was very excited to turn sixteen. Lmao, sweet sixteen was not so sweet I guess? I probably entered all the stages of grief and depression that year. It wasn’t even the corona or the lockdown, it started way before that. I remember seeing my Mock Jamb result and crying uncontrollably. Little did I know that bi ekun ba pe dale wa sun iyoku laaro ojo keji (if weeping endures till the night, you’ll continue crying in the morning ).

Anyway, I tripled my reading because maybe it wasn’t just enough, but ladies and gentlemen, my Jamb result came out and it was worse than the mock jamb. I prayed, I cried, I prayed and I kept crying. I felt like a teen with broken dreams and ambitions, and for weeks I felt no joy. It was really that bad, preparing for good success and meeting mediocre success. Fun fact: that same result granted me my first merit admission into law. So, I guess it really is bi ekun ba pe dale ayo nbo lowuro (if weeping endures till the night, joy comes in the morning)

 Then you know the thing about finding God in your grief? Exactly. I found him in my grief and told him he was all that matters because nothing else did. So 2020, I found God and I found him for good. 

This is why I think people find God in pain 

By the way, any Jamb slander? You’ll find me thereeee.

2021 was a good year for me. In fact it was a great year. My consecration from 2020 paid off so well that I felt so secure in God. Challenges are only inspiring and great when you have good results to show for it. My consecration grew stronger, and I knew I was marked out for glory. There was no buzz about turning seventeen, except for Alessia Cara’s song “Seventeen” which was inspiring.

Alessia Cara's Seventeen Lyrics

However, year 17 did come with its own challenges, but I learnt to stand and trust wholly on the promises of God, and boy did he turn up for me. He turned up so well I had no explanations, undeserved favour- that’s the word.

Seventeenth birthday🤭

Then came year 18, when you become the first part of “legal”. I mean, it was nice and all, but I don’t remember doing anything fun. I don't even have a picture😂. In year 18, I fell in love with the Holy Ghost. I had no special interest in him before; he was just the third person in the trinity, but my God, did I fall in love with him in year 18. I loved everything that he is, it was a revealing experience for me.

Year 19. Year 19. Year 19 has been hard; it has been so hard. When you think you are already getting a hang of something, you find out that you know nothing. For the most of it, I’ve just been surviving, sometimes barely surviving, but surviving regardless. In year 19, I have learnt, unlearnt, relearnt, revolved and evolved in every aspect of my life. Spiritually, academically( lmao academics is showing me shege😭😭), relationships, and every other thing in between. But in all, in all, I’ve learnt to not only trust God but also solely depend on him and let him write the pages of my life as he deems fit.

🤍♥️

And now (drum roll somebody?)

🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁

Year 20!!

 Glory to God!

I became excited about my 20th birthday last year, I guess. However, things have happened this year that almost made me nonchalant about it. But you only turn 20 once, and I decided to allow nothing to take my joy away, absolutely nothing. My birthday will mark the beginning of a decade and a new exciting year and I will not let a reason or reasons that will probably not matter in 5 years, spoil the memories of a landmark birthday.

The one where I turned 20!

 This year, I fully embody what adulthood is(minus the shege that comes with it abeg😂). This year, I choose to live and not merely survive. This year, I choose to chase God. This year, I choose to build strong relationships that will last me through the decade and even beyond. This year, I choose growth. This year, I choose to solely depend on the leading of the Holy Spirit. This year, I choose to never lose my joy. This year, I choose to let my light shine before men. This year, I choose to walk with God. This year, I choose mutualistic relationships above parasitic and most definitely commensalistic ones. This year, I allow myself to be loved. This year, I take my life from nature and chance and give it to God.

Lastly, I got this scripture on the eve to my birthday and it couldn't have been more beautiful🥺: Jesus answered, “If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? You must follow me.” (John 21:22)

Closer than Close- spoken word by Isi Igenegba 

I call this the Twentieth Floor!🎉❤️