Tenacity in Action

I’ve heard the word “tenacious” a number of times in my lifetime but I don’t think I have ever truly delved (I promise this is not AI-generated 😂) into what that word entails. 

Recently, I was in a Bible Class and the teacher talked about “tenacity”. After that teaching, something dangerous was ignited in me and I would like to share it with y'all too. (I know, I'm very generous😌)

To be tenacious means to be dogged or better still unwilling to yield or give up. A tenacious person to me is like a crazy person who despite all odds still goes for something. A tenacious person will say “regardless”, “even though”, “upon still”.

I will explain this in a religious format because that’s how best I know how to explain it. The Bible says “Ask and it shall be given unto you". When you ask and it’s not given, tenacity is not stopping there, it is seeking, you seek. When you seek and you don’t find, that's a clear indication that there’s an obstruction, a door, so you knock and it will be opened unto you. If it doesn't want to open, you knock it down!😤 That is tenacity!

In one of my blog posts I talked about holding onto a scripture when you are anxious. Well, being tenacious will be of great help because you’re saying “Since the scriptures says it, then it is so”. It might not look like it, heck it might not even feel like it but “the scriptures have said it and I strongly believe it is so”, tenacity!

As humans, we get discouraged at setbacks but tenacity is you trying over and over again until you strike gold. Remember even a dead clock is right twice in a day so no matter how hopeless it is, if you keep trying you will get it, eventually. Even if you don’t, tenacity is that you keep showing up and you never give up.

Therefore my dear reader, be tenacious. It’s not that difficult, and sometimes it truly is that difficult. But tenacity is you being defiant and unyielding. It strengthens your mindset and you'll be assured that if everything crumbles today, you’ll wake up tomorrow and have the courage to build again.

I hope this inspired you in some sort of way. If it did, share across boards so you’ll impact another life❤️. 

See you at the next read my lovelies!💋🤸🏼‍♀️

Finding Peace in Chaos: A Symphony of Comfort

What do you do to calm yourself in anxious seasons? I say seasons because I don’t mean short-term anxiety. I mean anxiety that runs for days and sometimes months. Where or who do you seek comfort from? I hope you don’t take on bad habits👀. 

Well, this is about me so I will be talking about where I seek comfort when I’m in my anxious season😗.

As a Christian, I know the broad theory is to seek comfort from God -remember not to bother people too much with your problem because I heard a saying not so recently that “If you tell me all your problems then what will you tell God”. I was shocked at first when I heard that because ahan people can be so unprovoked but there’s some truth to it because truly if you discuss all your life problems with a mortal man what will you tell the immortal God?

Yes, we seek comfort from God but there are means to seek his comfort, practical means and I will be sharing two of what works for me.

Firstly, I find comfort in the scriptures, the Bible. I could just be reading the Bible or a scripture randomly drops in my mind, and it resonates with my spirit so I run with it. You know that moment when you read a scripture and just know that it’s for you? That’s exactly what happens. 

Well, I’m not going to just say this, I will give you a practical example of how holding on to a scripture brought me comfort.

I finished my JUPEB programme in September 2021 and the result was to come out four to six weeks after the exams so it could meet up with the next admission. Unfortunately, October came and went, no result. November said hello and still no result!

Resumption was slated for early January, so we were anxiously expecting the result. December came by fast and it was at this moment I got a scripture. Mark 9:23 “If thou canst believe, all things are possible to him that believeth”. I held on to this scripture so dearly because come January school resumed and there was no result talk less of an admission.

The JUPEB result was to grant me a direct entry into 200-level, although I had a 100-level admission already. Then came the mock comfort, “At least you have an admission already that’s enough”😒 Fam! I did not just spend a year of my life, reading my ass off just to throw it all away😤.

January was running to an end and I kid you not there was still no hope of the result coming out but I still held on to the assuring words from the scriptures I received. I had to believe that everything was going to work out, it wasn’t easy but I kept running with it. 

Then came the deepest deep for me, we (minus the "I" in the "we"), decided to pay for my 100-level admission so I could proceed with registration and whatnot. I think the last time I ever felt that low was when I saw my Jamb result (story for another day😂💔).

Anyway, we paid for my 100-level admission and surprise surprise that same week, if I remember correctly the following day, guess what decided to come out? Yes, you guessed right the result😭😭 To be clear this was three weeks after the resumption.

I would love to give another practical example but this is already so lengthy and you probably read it up to this extent cause you like story🌚😂.

The Second thing I find comfort in is music. This has been my comfort for quite a while now. In secondary school, I had a playlist that could uplift my mood at any time and this was not even a gospel playlist. It had songs like “Fight Song ”and “Grace” by Rachel Platten, “Dream it Possible”, “Shooting Star”, “This is Me” from The Greatest Showman, “Titanium”, “Elastic Heart” and Oh! My all-time favourite “Unstoppable”, this song has been my ringtone since 2019\2020. I'm obsessed😭.

While all these are motivational and satisfying, you won’t find God’s comfort from them and remember we are talking about seeking God’s comfort. Yes, it was comforting but it didn’t bring the peace that transcends all understanding. In essence, you can’t get God’s comfort from songs that are not birthed from the secret place🧘🏽‍♀️.

Now, when I’m in my anxious season I seek for sounds that speak to my soul and I find comfort in it. The first time I clearly experienced this was my first semester exam 200 level. I was so overwhelmed, I mean massively overwhelmed then I caught hold of this song, “Yeshua” by Jesus Image. Hearing the name of Jesus being sung in my ear constantly assured me of him. I remember being plugged in and listening to the song over and over again while reading and even while sleeping and the experience was so comforting. 

During my second semester, the song that gave me comfort was “He Fights For Me” by TY Bello. I had listened to the song before but the day it struck me was the day I had two tests in one day and then the song just gave me immersive comfort, I remember humming it in the exam hall😅.

In a quite big nutshell, scriptures and songs are the means by which I seek comfort when I’m anxious. They have helped a lot, it feels like God’s special way of bringing me comfort. So when I’m anxious I know where to look for comfort.

Music might not be your thing but you can always find comfort in the scriptures🤍.

I would really love to know where you seek comfort when you’re anxious, please feel free to share.

I hope this has been insightful and if you've been following my posts then you are my motivation🥺❤️.

Yes, see you at the next read🤗.

When Delulu Is No Longer the Solulu

Do you guys know what’s worse than being deceived by people? Yes, you guessed right. Self-deceit.

I don’t mean the kind of self-deceit where you actually know what you are doing but them nosy people go “You’re deceiving yourself not me”. But in the real sense of it, you know your truth and you’ve accepted it, but for some reason, they refuse to accept it. 🙄

I’m talking about actual self-deceit that you are sometimes aware of. Being “delulu” but the harmful kind of delulu.

I sometimes have an argument in my head about which is better, ignorance or knowledge. Honestly, I’m still a bit confused, but I sometimes lean towards ignorance, and I will tell you why.

Most times, I mean like eighty per cent of the time when I do or I’m doing something I shouldn’t be doing, I do it with the knowledge that I’m not supposed to do it or be doing it. The feeling is so awful because there is a certain type of guilt that rushes in. 

Let’s say I know I should read my bible but I don't read it and I'm fully aware that the feeling of not wanting to read it is the work of flesh. Also, I know I should not yield to the flesh, but with this information still, I don’t read it.

Now opposed to this, let’s say I don’t read my bible, but I’m not aware of the danger not reading it poses, and the reason why I don’t feel like reading it. The guilt I will feel is less, if I will feel any at all. That's where the phrase "ignorance is bliss" comes in.

Unfortunately, I don’t have a resolution for this particular issue, but if you do have, maybe a mindset that can counter it or something, please share in the comment section.

On the knowledge and ignorance discussion. Knowledge can be so overwhelming. In the sense of you know so much, so you expect much, but you’ll be disappointed because the much you expect is not what you’ll get. 

However, as law students, we are taught that ignorantia juris non excusat, that is ignorance of the law is not an excuse. Regardless of your knowledge level, you’ll still be held accountable. In that case, it is very beneficial to be knowledgeable because your ignorance is not a valid excuse.

Well, as I was saying, self-deceit sucks, but unlike being fully aware when you are deceiving yourself, I’ve met people who deceive themselves, but for some reason, refuse to accept that they are deceiving themselves. This is even more pitiable, so I guess knowledge wins this round again. 

They seem to have lost so much touch with reality, and it’s saddening. I think some of them fail to realise that because you refuse to acknowledge a truth/fact does not stop it from being the truth.

This could pass as a casual blog post, but this is a desperate call for self-evaluation. A very desperate call 🤲

Pause and check for a minute if you are living life in all honesty or if you’ve been deceiving yourself in some sort of way. And if you are aware that you are living in self-deceit, change! Change today 🧎🏽‍♀️

Shalom! 🕊️
*Dramatic and soulful exit*
Oh yeah, see you at the next read.
❤️ & 💡

Rants and Reflections...

I don't have a story or hot take today, I just want to talk so I'll title this my "Rant 101".

Sometimes, we do things we’d rather not do(not necessarily bad things) because we are tired of holding up for too long. The problem is when we do those things we turn out to be the bad persons and are only understood by people who care to understand. Another problem is the people who those things are directed to should be more mature let’s say an older person and you’ve been the mature one all along and boom! You decide to be the child that you are and turn out to be the bad person.🥲

 Personally, if I do something that’s not from anger but is out of character for me then something of what I explained above happened. Trust me the Holy Spirit convicts me right after or before that but my mind just keeps saying “Why can’t you speak to the other person? I am but a child”. 

Up to the moment I’m writing this, something similar happened and the funny thing is I did nothing and doing nothing was the problem. The after-effect of my action doesn’t feel good but I’m truly just exhausted.

I don’t like to express my anger. I’d rather just leave it, be angry for a while, and then let my nature do its forgiveness thing. Because if I do anything contrary to this, say express my anger, I’ll be seen as the bad one. And as if that’s not enough, the scenario keeps playing in my mind. Then I blame myself for not keeping my cool. Then I don’t have peace.😔 It’s a whole lot, I know. And that’s why I’ve learnt to deal with my anger better. It doesn’t matter if I wasn’t in the wrong eventually, I will lose my peace. This also applies to the acting out-of-character scenario I explained above. So there’s no winning for me, is there? 😩

 This might look like avoidance but trust me I do it for my peace and sanity. It might not necessarily work for everyone so I’m not telling you to do the same.🌚

You know I said something happened right before I started writing this. Guess what? I apologized.💀Yes, I did. No, I’m not that much of a good or humble person but the Holy Spirit is a really holy Spirit😂 and He wanted me to. 

I’ve just come to accept that it shouldn’t matter to me if the person is mature or not, or if I have been mature for too long. The Holy Spirit will work on me as He deems fit and since this is personal it doesn’t matter how He’s dealing with other people. I am his precious masterpiece and He expects more from me.

If you can relate to any part of what I said above, this is what I will tell you. When you are pushed to do something out of character, and your defence is that the other person didn't do any better, try to consciously remember not to do anything just because of the action or reaction of someone.  That's not who you are, and if that's who you are, then carpe diem! (I'm just kidding😹)

Oh well, this is where my rants end and as usual I hope that regardless of the rants you picked one or two things.❤️

See you at the next read or rant, who knows?🤷🏻‍♀️👀

Unpacking Democracy: Who Decides? You or The Majority?

Maybe a nation can be governed correctly using a democratic system, but you can’t govern your life successfully based on democracy.

If you’re trying to get me to do something and you tell me “Everyone is doing it”, then you just gave me a solid reason not to do it. 🙅‍♀️

I’ve realized severally that the majority is not always right, and if you are a teenager then there is a high chance that the majority is wrong.🌚

I’ve learnt to be okay when I’m the only one or part of the few people standing for something and I'm writing this so you can learn to do the same.🤝

They say experience is the best teacher and that’s not wrong because if you grew up the way I did then you’ll find out that if you want to survive the world you’ll learn to accept that you’re different from everyone else and that does not make you any less of a person. Without this discovery, I probably would have drowned in a river of low self-esteem and self-hate and grown to be a very timid lady.🥲

Believe me, I’m not saying now I’m above any pressure that comes my way but I’ve built a mindset that makes me keep myself from feeling the pressure at all.😌

You might or might not have heard the saying “If you don’t stand for something, you’ll fall for everything”. Well, these are not just mere words! You can’t live your lives based on ‘vibes and inshallah’, you need to have personal life principles that guide your living. Emphasis on “personal” because I know there are some principles that we grew up with and our parents constantly sounded in our ears. Some we followed, some we threw away, and some we were necessarily made to follow. Regardless of this, you need to have your principles. There should be a low that you must not get below, not because “mummy said so” but because you say so.

I would say the younger you are while reading this the better for you. However, I've realised that popular opinion has a strong hold on older people as well. The constant need to feel among, the need to feel like you belong, the need not to be the weirdo or the uncool one. But I promise, once you break the hold, it becomes so liberating because you know that regardless of what people are moving with, this is where you stand and you're comfortable with it.

Now I know this feels like a motivational "aspire to perspire" speech, but in all honesty, I want you to see that you can live any and everywhere without feeling so pressured because of the principles that you hold so dear to yourself.

If you’re a Christian, then this is even more on you because you have to stand out every time and how lucky are you if you have other Christians with you, “shucks!” if you don’t, you will necessarily still have to stand out. This will be easy if you learn to be comfortable standing for what you stand for, not just because you have to but because you want to.

Most of the time, the majority does the dumbest thing and you’ll only realize this from an outsider's perspective, not when you are in the majority. To be fair, democracy does not even seem to work for most nations practicing it, so it’s even contestable that it is the best system of governance.🤷‍♀️

Martin Luther King Jr. mentioned that a man named Reinhold Niebuhr was of the opinion that groups are more immoral than individuals, and that hit me deep because truly if you check it, groups are really more immoral than individuals.

When next you feel pressured into being like other people, remember that life is not a democracy and the majority is mostly wrong, so nothing do you.💅😌

As much as this wasn't meant to be motivational, I hope you feel motivated. See you at the next read.💖 

Childhood Chronicles: Confessing to an Uncommitted Crime

Have you ever admitted to a crime you didn't commit? Well, I have and I'm about to take you down a melodramatic lane, stay with me🙃.

This happened around 2008/2009, I was in Nursery 2 and I remember this because I could picture my primary school right now and see the position of my class.

Nursery School Graduation🙈🙈

There was this boy whose name I can't recall who gave me a five naira note. I tried to give it back but he just wanted me to have it by all means. "Sweet boy", you might think but don't be so fast😂. I could not throw the money away, so I kept the money with me.

Before we go home, we sometimes stay with someone you can refer to as a "big mummy" and wait for our parents to come pick us up. She sold bread and groundnut, and I thought I should spend my five naira on groundnut ( I know, there was really a phase where groundnut was five naira🤧). Anyway, guess what? There was no groundnut and I could not spend my five naira.

 
My mum came to pick us up later that day and saw me with the five naira. She probed and probed and I kept telling her it was a boy in my class that gave it to me, but for some reason, she wasn't buying the story but I truly was not trying to sell her a story😩. 

Before the next morning, we concluded that I "took" the money from my teacher's table. Yes, I admitted to stealing the money🙂 To date I don't know why we came to that conclusion, I know five naira was a lot of money but I don't think I've ever stolen money in my life. Milo? Yes(I have a scar because of that😂) milk? Yes, but money??!   
The next day, my mum accompanied me to school and for reasons unknown to me, the boy denied that he had given me the money. You gave me five naira by force and then denied that you gave it to me?🤦🏻‍♀️ (men😤). If he was like this in nursery school I wonder how he is now😒. 

We went to my teacher and there was an imaginary place I took the money from. I don't think the teacher remembered losing any money, but I apologised for "taking her money" anyway. 

If it makes it any better my mum bought a lollipop for me after for doing the right thing and I took it with glee. I was a young innocent girl so I didn't think much of it, I still don't and I hold no grudge against anyone. I'm always amused anytime I remember the whole ordeal though😂. 

My mama and I🥰

So back to my question, have you ever admitted to committing a crime you knew nothing about? If you have I would like to hear about it! 

I hope you enjoyed reading through because I had a nice time writing this. See you at the next read❤️

Introducing Judith

 

AN INTRODUCTION...or maybe not👀

Heyyyy the name is Judith, pronounced as JU-dith not ju-DITH, It has been a lot of struggle getting people to pronounce it the right way. 

Anyway, I officially welcome you to my blog😊💕

 I love to think I'm mysterious, no, scratch that I am mostly mysterious😅but maybe just maybe this blog will be an insight into what goes on in my head. Interesting stuff I tell yah, but would it be interesting to you? I guess you'll have to follow me to find out.

Now this was meant to be an introduction about myself, but picture this, you're in front of an interviewer and he throws the question, 'Tell me about yourself' and you freeze up, That's exactly what it's like writing about myself and of course I could be mechanical about it but where's the fun in that?

Sooo, my name is Oluwafikayo Judith Adegoke, and some other names that I may or may not share along the way😶 My current age "status"😂 is getting old because tell me why yesterday I was shouting sweet sixteen and now I'm in my last teenage years😭 It's fine though I guess we all have to grow up at one point or the other. I'm currently in my third year studying Law, Why Law? You may ask but omoo me sef no know.😩 But for someone who had two admissions into the course rest assured that I'm in God's plan and to be honest it's sometimes fun, if you stick with me you'll get more gist on what it's like and what it has been and hopefully what it will be.

Yeah, I am a Christian🎉 and I don't mean Christianity as in religion but Christianity as in lifestyle, was born into it and grew up to love it. You'll most definitely be getting more on this topic because it's a whole lot and the beam of existence for some of us.

Family life? I am the third child of four children, two elder brothers I can bill and a younger sister who bills me (sigh😒). That's just official though, I have an adopted elder brother(lol😅) and my parents have always had people around for as long as I can remember, most times extended family members and of course, these people become close family members as well so it's a pretty big family.

There was a time when having hobbies was a thing, now this stage of my life just feels like academics and sleep anytime I get the chance away from books (this education thing has messed me up😔) I guess what I'm trying to say is my hobby presently is sleep😭but I had hobbies back in Secondary School.

 I loved writing stories, some I finished some I didn't. I could cook up a story on the spot and rarely had writer's block, never published any of them. I also loved reading novels and stories, I still do but not so frequently not only because of time but also because of how rated R most books are now, Why??? Whatever happened to morality? 

I loved singing too, in my head I sang like all the Disney and Nickelodeon characters who knew how to sing😅 My brothers made sure to ring it in my head that I couldn't though, but I have a civil voice not good good but not bad either. 

Lastly, listening to music was a hobby but now it's a therapy. "Music is therapy"-Judith 2023😌

Once when I was giving my eldest brother a run down of my chaotic academic life he asked if I had a YouTube channel because according to him every law student in Nigeria should😂 This is not YouTube neither is this vlogging but this could count for something I guess? That's not entirely the reason why I'm starting this blog though I guess it just feels nice to have a place where I can freely rant and let out all the opinions I have about things and life in general.

There goes our introduction, if you made it this far, you're my new favourite person. I hope you had a lovely time reading through 'cause I had an awesome time writing this! 

So long so good, see you at the next read.💌